My So-Called Quiz

Don’t be coy.. Which My So-Called Life character are you?

1. Would you cover your lever arch file in..

A. Graffiti, lipstick kisses and swear words.
B. Doodles of gay things and a Samaritan helpline number.
C. Jordan Catalano’s name and a doodle of a cat.
D. Nothing, unless brown paper / laminate counts?

It’s the 90s in autumn. What else are you going to wear, a coat? God.

2. Where do you get your clothes?

A. Steal them from the roadside after a prostitute has been murdered.
B. Get given them by the homeless.
C. Mother buys them from Gap and you accessorize with your dads lumberjack shirts.
D. Mother buys them from Gap and you tuck them all in to your underwear.

3. Who is your biggest influence?

A. Madonna.
B. Madonna.
C. Anne Frank.
D. Some boring librarian birdwatching turd.

4. What’s your favourite food?

A. Cheese.
B, Tinned beans
C. Whatever dad’s cooked up. GOD. Ragu linguine. God. I don’t know.
D. That Jewish bread?

“Oh, no it’s okay, I’ve already got dinner plans..”

5. What’s your favourite class at school?

A. Don’t know. Hate school. Cigarettes.
B. Warming yourself by the furnace with the janitor.
C. I guess English.. Or female studies. Gender empowerment. Or geography.
D. All of it. I wish I could be there forever and never leave.

6. What’s your most prized possession?

A. My mothers wallet.
B. My sleeping bag.
C. A kiss with Jordan Catalano.
D. My telescope…

MOSTLY A’s: Oh shit. You’re Rayanne. Fucksticks. That means you’re a tramp with a heart of brass. Try not to get too wasted at school.
MOSTLY B’s: You’re a fashionable, gay, homeless, “Hispanic” (can we say that? Sure we can) RICKY! You so fly! And homeless.
MOSTLY C’s: You loser. Angela has a perfect family, perfect upbringing, perfect hair. Shame about her fucking personality, AMIRITE?
MOSTLY D’s: Brian, or BRAIN if you’re Catalano. You’re a nerdy, Jewish boy who rollerskates around waiting for the perfect moment to mansplain something to Angela.

2 thoughts on “A So-Called Quiz

  1. It was a very close run contest between me being Rayanne or Ricky… I think I’m a hybrid of the two, Rayacky or Ricanne… Checking the relative attributes this means I’m basically a homeless tramp made of brass that can fly…

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